


i’m so lucky i got you

by orphan_account



Series: when i got nothing i got you [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Cute Kageyama Tobio, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Everyone Is Dating, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff and Crack, Furniture Shopping, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, Holding Hands, KageHina - Freeform, Karasuno Family, Kissing, M/M, Moving In Together, No Smut, POV Kageyama Tobio, Pizza, Sexual Humor, Soulmates, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Wine, everyone thinks kagehina are DISGUSTING(ly cute), girl idk what else to tag damn, hinata jerks off a bonsai tree tho, hinata loves breadsticks, hinata lowkey a dom, i will avoid writing smut for as long as i can, just kissing, kageyama tobio cries, no sex though NONE, they have some small disagreements, theyre kinda weird im sorry, this kinda turns into a crackfic, well not really but also kagehina are soulmates in every universe so
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:54:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24123181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: kageyama averts his eyes. squirms. "we've just moved in together... and i feel really... really... good." he lets his hand fall from hinata's mouth so he can hide his face behind his palms, now coated in a thin layer of nervous sweat."so... what?" hinata asks, scrunching his nose cutely, "is the apartment making you like, horny?"kageyama groans, “not…exactly,” he tries to explain, but he feels wound so tight. feels like he might actually explode if he carries on. his brain is a proverbial can of baked beans. "just... the idea. of it. of you and me here. shit—it's hard to explain." he squirms again, shaking his head.“you're all red." hinata giggles, "so cute."(kageyama and hinata move in together. kageyama gets very emotional about it. hinata gets overexcited about everything.)this fic is in lowercase because i am a loser. thank you for your time.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Series: when i got nothing i got you [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1740577
Comments: 5
Kudos: 71





	1. in which hinata loves breadsticks and kageyama cries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk how to do this i feel like i was supposed to add the tags as i went along but i just put everything all at once even though there’s only 1/3 chapters up oh god am i STUPID??? 
> 
> anyways i failed out of college and wrote this to cope enjoy<3 
> 
> wait one more thing: the song hinata plays in the middle of this chapter is ‘what you won’t do for love’ by bobby caldwell ... (yall know how it goes.... yknow.... ‘i guess you wonder where ive beeeen’) (it’s actually not an 80s song kageyama is off by 2 years smhhh)

kageyama watches his tiny boyfriend place the final box onto the floor of their otherwise empty studio apartment with an unknowing smile tracing his lips. the  redhead  falls back on his behind as a huge sigh of relief escapes him. a fatigued grin adorn s his face as he turns his head to glance back to kageyama, who stands in the doorway, silent. 

hinata grins wider, vaguely resembling the chesire cat—or maybe some sort of deranged little gremlin. "we did it!" hinata states the obvious. "we're _done_." kageyama nods. they are. after making endless trips from the parking lot and back up three flights of stairs, each time wielding various sized cardboard boxes full of their junk, they finally, _finally_ finished. 

the boxes are strewn across the blank space, brown cardboard almost blending into the plain beige floors and walls. kageyama tilts his head. it doesn't exactly feel like home yet, but it's only their first night here together. all of their stuff is still packed away and they don't even have any real furniture yet, aside from a mini fridge. 

speaking of which. "i'm thirsty." kageyama says gruffly, trudging over to the tiny refrigerator. it was gifted to them specially, from daichi and sugawara, who are still slightly overbearing and parent-like, years after they've all graduated from high school. they kept saying things like, don't forget to eat, hence why their housewarming gift was a _fridge_ , of all things. suga was fussing over hinata for the most part. he knows that as much as the small guy can eat, sometimes he strays. gets too distracted and forgets to nourish himself. to ease his senpai’s worries, kageyama assured suga that he would make sure hinata is always well fed.

both suga and daichi had smiled that warm, fond smile up at him when he'd said that. one that clearly reads  _ you've grown up _ , or something like that.  it had thrown him off.  he  supposes  because the y ’ re older, it must be nice  for them  to see the  hotheaded  kids they used to take care of like this — not only fend ing for themselves, but look ing out for each other. that's the only thing  kageyama can think of anyway. why else would they have smiled like that, all ridiculous and elated, like a pair of proud parents ? 

though kageyama still didn ’ t understand the way their eyes sparkled.  it shouldn't be that surprising, right? he and hinata have been dating since their third year of high school. it's been years.  kageyama would be a s pectacularly shitty boyfriend if he couldn't take care of  hinata by now. 

"there's beer left, right?" hinata calls out across the vast space. the apartment is tiny, but without a proper arrangement of furniture it feels big. almost hollow. their voices bounce off the walls and ring out in echoes. "i want one." 

kageyama swings the little door open, greeted instantly with a refreshing chill and the gentle whir of the machine working. he closes his eyes briefly, feeling the cool gust smear comfortably across his cheeks, a stark contrast from the summer heat that clings to him like a vice. when his eyes flutter open again, they settle on two beer bottles on their sides, pushed to the back of the mini fridge. 

walking back towards the entrance of their new home, he sees hinata is face down on the hardwood, unresponsive even when he attempts to hand him his beer. kageyama rolls his eyes, crouching down and pressing the cold beverage into the back of his idiot boyfriend's neck. 

"ah — _ ah _ ," hinata practically moans. "feels so nice. so  _ cold _ ." he praises, voice muffled as he speaks directly into the floor. 

kageyama snorts, removing the bottle from hinata's neck and pushing himself back to sit opposite of him. "get up, dumbass." he says mindlessly, without any real bite. 

hinata lifts his head up slowly, staring at kageyama with flushed cheeks. "why is it so hot in here?" he asks, to no one in particular. "i wanna stay on the floor." 

"it's summer. of course it's hot. and didn't you  _ just _ say you wanted a beer?" kageyama raises an eyebrow, "'cause if you don't that's fine. i don't mind drinking them both." 

"you wouldn't," hinata says. he's got his head propped by his hands now, staring up at kageyama petulantly. kageyama takes note in the way his cheeks squish when they're pressed up against his little palms. then the pout that forms on his lips, all hot pink and smooth like flower petals. "you don't even like drinking that much." hinata says haughtily, like he's figured everything out. like he's foiled all of kageyama's plans. 

the triumphant look on hinata's face is much too smug for his liking. 

the corners of kageyama's mouth twitch and he promptly extends his leg so he can shove his foot in hinata's face. hinata protests noisily, a string of whiny complaints pouring out hastily from his mouth. he finally sits up, frowning as he snatches the beer from kageyama's hand. 

"what?" kageyama says, trying not to smile at the stupidly cute look of frustration that pinches hinata's soft features. 

hinata huffs, opening his beer with a loud, satisfying click. "your feet stink." he mumbles. 

"do not." 

"do too." 

"and what do your feet smell like? since you're such a fragrant little  _ rose _ ." kageyama drawls sarcastically, watching the way hinata's mouth wobbles, threatening to burst with that lopsided grin that's seemingly always there. 

hinata pushes his  fringe  out of his face, fingers easily threading through the unruly mess. he turns his nose up, placing his hand on his chest proudly . "i actually like to think of myself as more of a  _ marigold _ ." he corrects, then gestures to his hair. "makes sense, don't ya think?" 

"but you're not golden," kageyama argues, "you're orange. like a mandarin." 

hinata scowls at him, uncrossing his legs so he can prod the side of kageyama's thigh with his toe. kageyama tries to push his foot away, but hinata persists. "shut up, you big blueberry." 

"you  love this big blueberry." 

hinata hums quietly, taking a sip of his beer. "unfortunately." 

"unfortunately, huh?" kageyama mirrors him, taking a sip of his own, then grimac es outwardly at the taste. he's really not a fan of alcohol — hinata's completely right about that. it all tastes pretty unappetizing .  he  figures he could  easily live without ever having a sip of the stuff again. his boyfriend on the other hand, is the type to attend wine tastings . or maybe sit at a bar all night just to try the best cocktails. as a result, kageyama drinks occasionally. socially. sometimes competitively (he and hinata haven ’ t changed  _ that _ much). 

"yeah." hinata responds. he's puffing his cheeks out too hard. he looks like an idiot. a really pretty one with scarlet cheeks and big shiny  amber  eyes, but an idiot nonetheless. 

"that explains why you just moved in with me, right?" kageyama grins a little, watching hinata mimic his expression, but ten fold. brighter than bright. when hinata smiles he embodies the sun. he's all radiant warmth, like a beam of sunlight on  the clearest day . 

"once again, very unfortunate." hinata says. there's a giggle bubbling up from his lips. kageyama wants to kiss the sound out of his mouth and swallow it with his own. he's always liked that. hinata's endless enthusiasm when it comes to everything, especially kissing. he'll never say it out loud, but the way hinata laughs into his mouth or smiles into kisses like they're sharing secrets, never fails to give him a classic case of  _ the butterflies™_. 

kageyama makes a noise of agreement from behind the brim of his beer, hiding his smile behind the bottle. he presses his lips to the cold surface, sighing with something like contentment as hinata  barks a l augh again . the latter  proceeds to chug the rest of his  own  beer like it's water. when he's done he lays on his back, pulling his shirt up to pat his belly. 

he's like a child, really. kageyama cannot believe this is the man he's in love with. 

"that was refreshing," hinata says. his eyes are closed now. kageyama watches the way his lashes sit prettily on his cheekbones. "not too filling though. do we have any food?" 

"obviously not." kageyama answers, setting his half full beer down beside him. he knows what hinata's hinting at. 

"well... can we like, change that?" kageyama's already a step ahead of him, searching for the number of the pizza place they passed by earlier. 

"mhm." he taps on the number from his notes and selects the 'add to contacts' option, since he knows they'll probably be ringing up this pizza joint a lot from now on. "cheese or pepperoni?" 

"sausage." 

kageyama freezes, glancing up from his phone to look at hinata, who's still sprawled out on the floor, unmoving, eyes still shut. "you never get sausage." 

"i wanna try it," he insists, popping an eye open to meet kageyama's stare. he smiles faintly, then stretches his arms out above him. "new place, new pizza topping." 

kageyama scoffs, "that's so dumb." he also thinks it's very cute and wholesome, but he doesn't say  it.

" _ you're _ dumb." hinata murmurs. 

"you're barely one hundred and seventy centimeters." kageyama shoots back. 

hinata sits up in record timing, eyes wide and burning with the fire and rage of every short person on the planet. he lurches at kageyama then, but he's already expecting that, so he sticks his leg up, watching as hinata's chest smacks against his foot. he holds back a laugh at how hinata's short arms are reaching around, trying to grab at him. 

"kageyama, you big — _big moron_ — " he grunts, swinging aimlessly at kageyama. his hands just won't reach.  ( even though he's grown quite a bit since high school, he's still so endearingly  _ small _ . )

he shushes hinata,  taking pleasure  the way it clearly infuriates him. "keep it down, i'm about to make the call," hinata gives up then, pouting as he slumps against kageyama's leg, now opting to hug it rather than swat at it. "hi, yes, can i get a pie for delivery? half cheese, half sausage?" 

hinata looks up at him with big eyes and starts mouthing something to kageyama, but kageyama's really shit at reading lips, so he just throws his boyfriend a puzzled kind of glare. the man on the line is already asking him if that's all he's ordering. 

hinata sighs, exasperated, then whispers, " _ breadsticks _ ." 

"can i also get some breadsticks? five piece — " 

hinata makes a noise of disapproval, shaking his head, and pointing up, up,  _ up _ . 

"six?" 

he shakes his head again. still pointing up.

"seven?  _ eight _ ?" 

hinata nods excitedly. personally, kageyama thinks that's a little over the top, since they  are in fact, still both athletes and the food that they're about to indulge in is less than nutrient . he tries to be mindful of things like this because whether it feels like it or not, they ’ re getting older. they won ’ t have the same bounce back metabolisms forever. 

but hinata looks so  _ happy _ . 

he's too whipped for this tangerine of a man. 

"eight pieces please." kageyama confirms, watching his boyfriend bounce around as he relays their new address into the receiver. when he hangs up, hinata has moved on from bouncing in place on their floor, to dancing on his toes. kageyama watches him fondly, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as he tries not to laugh at how uncoordinated he is when he dances. "all this over some breadsticks?" 

hinata lets out a gasp, all  affronted  and dramatic , like kageyama has just cursed his entire family. "don't speak about breadsticks like that." he scolds, waving a condemnatory finger at him. 

"like what?" kageyama pushes, delighted by his boyfriend's antics. sometimes he gets like this now — instead of being irritated by hinata's idiocy, somewhere along the way he's just starting joining in. 

"like you're...  _ better _ than them." hinata says, and he sounds absolutely disgusted at the possibility that kageyama could hold himself above an eight piece basket of excessively buttered garlic bread. 

"and what if i am?" 

"you're not." hinata says decisively. "there are two kinds of gods that rule this world, tobio . meat gods and garlic bread gods." 

kageyama makes a face at him, "what religion is this?" 

" my religion." hinata says dreamily. he continues to dance a little, swaying his hips to an invisible beat. 

"pretty sure you need followers to start a religion." 

hinata turns to him then, smirking, "i had a feeling you'd say something like that." he chuckles lowly, sounding all too pleased with himself as he places his hands confidently on his waist. "i ’ ll have you know — it only takes three people to be considered a religion." 

"well, i'm not joining." kageyama says immediately, snickering under his breath as his boyfriend's face falls into an expression of betrayal. 

hinata sticks out his tongue. "you're mean!" he exclaims. "but fine. i don't need you anyway. nishinoya and tanaka senpai are believers." 

"did actually you ask them? or are you forcing them to join?" he squints at hinata, teasing him. 

"they are... default members." 

kageyama stifles a laugh behind his hand, "that's not how it works, dumbass."

hinata just smiles at him, giggling softly as he sways. the beer must have him a little buzzed. "i wanna play a song."  he says suddenly.

kageyama flicks at the glass of his own beer bottle, having no desire to continue drinking it. "then play a song — i don't care.  hey,  you want this?" he lifts the remainder of his beverage over his head. hinata practically floats over, face all dopey and cheeks vivid with a pink blush of felicity. 

" _yes _ _~_ " hinata sings as he grabs it carefully, bowing his head like kageyama's just done him an immense favor, "thank you, tobio." he says, pitching his voice at least two octaves deeper.

kageyama lets a small laugh rack his body. "you're a mess." 

"you like it though," hinata says, taking a big gulp of kageyama's drink. he's sitting again, cross legged and enthusiastic as he scrolls through his phone with his other hand. he lets out a small noise of enthusiasm as he picks an 80‘s song from his spotify playlist, letting it blast through the tinny phone speakers. kageyama leans forward,  fixated on the  spot  of dust lodged in hinata's hair. 

"you think i'm a  _ hot _ mess."  hinata continues, voice dripping with something dangerous.

kageyama's fighting a smile again, pursing his lips as he moves closer, picking the lint out from his boyfriend’s orange fringe. "maybe." kageyama whispers, then flicks the miscellaneous speck off  somewhere  to their right. 

hinata's cranes his neck and places a wet kiss on kageyama's nose. "thank you." he beams, running a hand through his now lint-free hair. 

kageyama's face erupts with heat and he leans away immediately, throwing an arm over his face, "you're so embarrassing." 

"what're you embarrassed about bakageyama," hinata chides, bringing the glass up to his cheek and smushing it there. his eyes are pools of warm caramel. kageyama stares back at him, feeling a familiar ache in his chest — the one he gets when the only thing he wants to do in the whole world in that moment, is touch hinata.  then,  hinata ’ s tongue darts out to wet his lips and  the feeling intensifies. "we're all alone here, ya know. no one can see us. or hear us." 

"they can definitely hear us." kageyama flushes, hoping they aren't too loud. he wasn't thinking about how thin the walls probably are up until now. 

"aw, they can?" hinata's disappointment is immeasurable. "but that means i can't scream when we — " 

kageyama is quick to cover his mouth with his hand before he can finish that thought, "embarrassing." he repeats lowly. "don't say things like that — not right now when we've just ..." he trails off, too overwhelmed by how scorching hot the room is now. 

hinata looks at him expectantly, waiting for him to finish. 

kageyama averts his eyes. squirms. "we've just moved in together... and i feel really... really...  _ good _ ." he lets his hand fall from hinata's mouth so he can hide his face behind his palms, now coated in a thin layer of nervous sweat. 

"so... what?" hinata asks, scrunching his nose cutely, "is the apartment making you like, horny?" 

kageyama groans,  “ not … exactly , ” he tries to explain, but he feels wound so tight. feels like  he might actually explode if he carries on .  his brain is a proverbial can of baked beans. "just... the idea. of it. of you and me here. shit — it's hard to explain." he squirms again, shaking his head.

"you're all red." hinata giggles, "so cute." 

"i'm anything but," he responds with a little frown. "you're the cute one." 

hinata's complexion darkens. it’s akin to the bright pigment of a  strawberry. "shush." he says, then brings the beer bottle to his lips slowly, eyeing kageyama over the cylinder body. there's sweat glimmering on his forehead under the one shitty light that hangs from their ceiling. 

"you're sweating." kageyama points out. 

"am i?" hinata asks, but he sounds like he literally couldn't care less. his eyes are trained on kageyama with a flame of hunger flickering behind them. he sets the beer down, pushing it clear out of the way. kageyama looks over him warily. his demeanor resembles an animal of prey. the glint in his eyes is like a lion's. 

"uh huh," kageyama swallows thickly. hinata's has started to close the space between them, crawling on all fours like a wildcat ( a really  sexy wildcat )  until he's positioned between kageyama's legs. " _ shouyou _ ." kageyama breathes. 

"mm?" hinata bites into his lip, blinking up innocently, lashes fluttering and everything. 

_ brat._ "what are you thinking about?" he asks, not really knowing if he's prepared to hear the answer to that. (spoiler alert: he is not. like at all) 

hinata just hums absentmindedly, reaching out and ghosting kageyama's forearm with gentle fingertips. "how pretty you are." he admits in a hushed voice. "and how much prettier you would be if you let me fuck you into the floor right now." 

kageyama shivers violently, the sensation prickling up and down his spine and buzzing in his fingertips until he has to take a breath to calm himself. he feels hinata's hands on him, prodding into the skin above his hip bone. 

"do you want that?" hinata purrs, mouth suddenly warm and attached to the spot under his ear. kageyama lets his arms snake around the smaller frame of his boyfriend, pulling them both onto the floor in one clean swoop. "do you?" 

there's heat curling in kageyama's lower abdomen. something searing and primal. “ _shouyou_." he says again, because it's the only thing he  can say without completely falling apart underneath his touch. 

hinata knows this. relishes this. the smirk that itches onto his lips — so wet and vividly pink — is nothing short of vicious, like he’s plotting to eat kageyama alive. not that kageyama would mind. the feverish and nearly animalistic pull between them is setting him on fire from the inside. hinata adds to the heat. he’s a human furnace laying on top of him, skin to skin. kageyama’s hands are lodged in his hair, pulling every time hinata nips hard enough to make him gasp. to bruise the skin there. 

hinata loves marking kageyama up. he treats the expanse of kageyama’s smooth skin like an empty canvas, splashing it in raw reds that turn to mixtures of purples and blues. kageyama finds it bothersome to cover it all up the next day, but he could never bring himself to tell hinata to stop. not when the pleasure that spikes him is like no other, warm and fervent enough to make him shudder. he can’t stop thinking — _ hinata is his _ and  _ he is hinata’s  _ and here they are, about to share their lives together. 

and it’s  _ that _ feeling; that flurry of lust and love bound together so,  so tightly that kageyama starts feeling overwhelmed. there are tears burning in his eyes before he can stop them. he grabs hinata’s face, pulling him up from where he’s buried in the crook of kageyama’s neck, and kisses him full on the mouth, rough enough to cause a surprised noise to arise in his throat. hinata falls into it easily though, parting his lips and letting kageyama’s tongue explore his mouth a little before swirling his own around enthusiastically. 

even as hinata’s grinding down against him, their hips colliding almost painfully slow, kageyama is teary eyed. even as hinata’s hands are all over him, leaving finger prints all over his body, dragging across his abs and his pelvis — he can ’ t stop the waterworks. he wants to hide it. wants to drown in the ocean that hinata shouyou. wants to disappear entirely underneath his waves — but he gives himself away when he sniffles. 

hinata breaks away instantly, eyes wide as he stares at kageyama, still nose to nose with him. his lips are red and swollen, bitten to hell. the only sounds in the apartment are them panting softly and the song hinata played on his cellphone starting over, a chorus of jazzy trumpets and a smoky voice. kageyama recognizes the song, when he thinks about it. hinata plays it in the shower a lot. 

“tobio, what’s wrong? why are you crying? ”  he asks in a whisper, thumbs swiping at kageyama‘s cheeks helplessly as his worried eyes scan his face. 

and kageyama smiles. hinata blinks at him, a little unnerved by this — this combination of tears and smiles. doesn’t know what to make of it. then the words are tumbling out of kageyama’s mouth, “i love you so much,”  he croaks,  “i’m so happy.” 

the distressed confusion on hinata’ s face morphs into something warmer. hinata inhales shakily, then grins as bright as ever, before smacking kageyama’ s chest. kageyama grunts and frowns briefly, looking at hinata’ s shaking frame. he’s laughing. 

“you’re  so—“  he starts. pauses. shakes his head.  “i love you too, you giant fuckin’ sap. ” 

kageyama’s mouth wobbles precariously. he ’ s so happy, but all he wants to do is cry for some reason.  “sorry,”  he says,  “i guess i kinda killed the mood.” 

hinata titters quietly, rolling off of him, but staying close. both of them stare up at the ceiling — their ceiling. plain and white. empty. but it’s theirs. things would be like that forever now. everything that’s kageyama’s is inherently hinata’s. instinctively, his hand searches for his boyfriend’s. hinata entwines their fingers comfortably. it feels so natural, their hands together — melding as one. 

“ _oy_ ,”  kageyama pipes up after a while.  “you believe in soulmates?” 

“soulmates?”  hinata inquires. his voice is soft. 

“yeah. those.”  kageyama shifts, jostling hinata’s shoulder a bit. 

hinata hums curiously.  “i’ve never given it much thought, to be honest. do you?”

kageyama chews his lip nervously. he wants to say he’ s thought about it everyday since he first realized he had a big fat crush on hinata, way back in high school. has thought it over a million and one times and thanked the stars above that they let him meet hinata shouyou. that they were born in the same lifetime. put on the same planet, same continent, same country, until they found themselves united at karasuno. even if it was begrudgingly at first. 

“my sister used to tell me about the red string of fate.”  kageyama says instead.  “that two people — soulmates — are bound together by it. for eternity. nothing can sever it.”

“ah, i’ve heard of that.”hinata says,  “you think there’s one between us? ” 

kageyama heart skips. his hand feels sweaty in hinata’s. he closes his eyes.  “yeah.”  he says quietly.  “don’t you? ”

hinata squeezes kageyama’s hand.  “well, i wouldn‘t be surprised. ever since we met — it ’ s always been you. it never could ’ ve been anyone else.”  he chuckles fondly. nostalgically. like he ’ s remembering the way they slid into becoming this infamous dynamic duo so easily, despite barely knowing each other. 

kageyama swallows.  “yeah.”he says stupidly, because his mind has started fizzle out. he doesn’t understand how hinata can just out and say things like that. he wants to kiss him again. wants to feel every part of him. wants to know every piece of him intimately — forever. 

“you felt it back then too, right? when you threw your first toss to me. felt like i was  _ meant _ to spike it.”  hinata mumbles, turning to his head to face kageyama. 

kageyama turns to him too, watching hinata blink tiredly, but contentedly.  “you were like …  a miracle, or something. ”he says slowly, cheeks already growing hot from the way hinata brightens,  “i tried not to show it, but i was scared that no one would ever trust me to toss to them again and then you just …  came out of nowhere. never judged me for the whole king of the court thing. not just that, but you …  trusted me. wholeheartedly.”

“there was really no reason not to,”  hinata replies,  “you told me to trust you — so i did.”

“i know,”  kageyama says with a smile. he feels so lucky. like he’s won the lottery. hit the damn jackpot.  “you even closed your eyes to hit my toss — you were such a weirdo.”

hinata scoffs, scandalized.  “ _h_ _ey!_ ”  he bumps kageyama’s shoulder with his own. kageyama bumps him back.  “it’s not weird to trust people.” 

“you’re right. it’s really admirable, actually.”  hinata beams at the high praise.  “shut up.”  kageyama mumbles, pushing his boyfriend’s face playfully, satisfied when an indignant squawk falls from his lips. hinata pokes his side harshly and kageyama hisses twice as loud. 

hinata’s eyes are gleaming determinedly. kageyama glares at him. the only thing going through their singular shared braincell is:  _ i can’_ _t lose to him._

a nd just like that, they descend into a much-too-serious-for-their-age wrestling contest, rolling around on the floor of their new apartment together. 

(they really haven’ t changed at all)

they’re interrupted minutes later by the doorbell, just as kageyama pins hinata for the third time out of five — making him the winner. 

“ _ha_!”  kageyama cheers, throwing his hands up victoriously.  “i  win.” 

“ _gah _ — i almost had you too!”  hinata grumbles. he doesn’t dwell on his loss for too long though, not with the promise of pizza and breadsticks behind their door. he’s up in seconds, already padding to the entrance with some extra pep in his step, singing an impromptu song about how delicious cheese is. 

an hour later finds them with their backs on the floor once again, this time comparing the sizes of their food babies, courtesy of hinata. they turn it into a competition unsurprisingly, with hinata cheating and puffing his belly out to fool kageyama into thinking his food baby is bigger. kageyama catches him in the act and promptly karate chops his gut, earning a strangled shriek from hinata. 

after they squabble for a bit, they sit in a comfortable silence, both of them processing what today means to them and what it will mean for the rest of their lives. 

“i wanna paint the walls.”  hinata says, voice cutting through the gentle quiet. kageyama looks over at him and is met with his striking side profile. his eyes travel from the line of hinata’s jaw to the slope of his nose. his doe eyes are scanning the wall in front of them, but he seems faraway. like he’s already imagining them in the future, getting theirselves dirty with whatever color he chooses.  “i wanna paint like …  a mural. i saw some on pinterest and they were like — _ gwuahh_ _!_ so cool. ” 

“we don’t have any artistic talent whatsoever.”  kageyama reminds him.

hinata pulls his knees to his chest, then he turns his head to kageyama.  “i think we could do it. if we really tried. i mean how hard could it be?” 

realistically, kageyama knows that they both suck at drawing. an entire mural on the wall seems highly unlikely, but with the way hinata is looking at him right now — with his entire future reflecting in the form of warm brown eyes — he wants to try. for him, he’d be willing to try anything.

kageyama sighs, reaching out and flicking hinata’s nose. hinata pouts.  “we’re gonna need a lot of paint.”  he says, chest tight with affection as his boyfriend flashes him one of his most dazzling smiles.

“ so you’ ll do it with me? ”

“ that’ s what she said. ”

“oh, you’re sick. we were having a cute little moment there, tobio.”  he leans forward until their foreheads are touching. kageyama stares at him blankly, though his heart is screaming fondly at the shock of orange before him from the confines of his rib cage.  “i bet i can paint better than you.”  hinata whispers in this intimate space. 

“ bet you ten dollars you can’t.”

“how about ten kisses instead?”  hinata coos, puckering his lips. 

“ten dollars  _ and _ ten kisses.” 

hinata separates their foreheads at that, to kageyama’s dismay.  “you are  _ so _ ungrateful.”  he says in disbelief, laughter threatening bubble from his throat. kageyama smiles slyly at him, similar to the creepy one he used to do during their matches, and that’s all it takes for hinata to collapse on the floor laughing. 

they decide to call it a night soon after that, rolling their respective futons out after they’d brushed their teeth and changed into their night clothes — though hinata doesn’t make good use of his futon, already abandoning it in favor of crowding kageyama’s. kageyama pushes him off several times, but hinata, never one to give up, returns to the futon each time, grinning at him wildly.

kageyama eventually settles for having hinata lay on top of him, orange hair tickling his chin. 

“w hat’ s the plan for tomorrow?” hinata asks.

“furniture shopping.”  kageyama answers simply.

“yeah, but like …  where?” 

kageyama blinks.  “huh.”  he hadn’t thought that far ahead.  “i don’t know.”

hinata sticks a thumbs up over both their heads, so kageyama can see it.  “nice one, dude.”  he says sarcastically. 

“shut up, dumbass.”  kageyama flushes.  “you didn’t even think of it  ‘till right now.”

“at least i thought of it  at all, you big idiot.”

kageyama mumbles under his breath. 

“what’s that?  _ thank you shouyou, you’re the best boyfriend ever in the world?”_hinata urges to kageyama to agree, but he just huffs. however, this does not deter the latter, who continues talking to himself.  “why thank you, tobio. you’re too kind.”

“whatever. i’ll do some research right now, since it‘s keeping you awake.”  he grumbles, reaching for his phone. 

hinata clucks his tongue, ”i really don’t like your tone. ”

“ sounds like a personal problem.”

hinata pushes himself up and off of kageyama’ s chest, opting to sit and straddle him instead. “ tobio, my darling. my dearest. do you have to be this insufferable right when we’r e about to sleep?”

“don’t know what you’re talking about.”  kageyama grunts, refusing to look at hinata, though he feels his eyes boring into him. instead he focuses on typing  _ furniture stores near me_ _,_ into the google search bar. 

hinata is silent above him. silence from hinata is a rarity, meaning it’s actually a bit terrifying when a few minutes pass and there’s still no peep from him. when the atmosphere starts feeling too eerie for kageyama to ignore, he looks up, met with the sight of hinata looking off to the side, arms crossed impatiently.  _ fuck, i made him mad.  _ he thinks dismally. 

kageyama locks his phone and tosses it to the side for the time being.  “hey.”  no answer.  “ _h_ _eyy._ ”  he grabs hinata’s thighs and pulls him closer. 

hinata just purses his lips. 

kageyama blows his bangs out of his face and sits up swiftly, meeting hinata face to face, and yet, the latter is still determined not to look at him. 

“why are you like this.”  kageyama deadpans.

this choice of words seem to spark something within him. kageyama watches hinata ’ s nostrils flare.  “ _me_?”  hinata snaps.  “you started it! you and your stinky attitude.” 

kageyama chews the inside of his cheek. averts his eyes. he really didn’t think it would affect hinata this much. he’s baffled by it. isn’t he  _ always _ like this? why is it such a problem now? 

“ hey, remember that time like, two hours ago? when you were crying about how much you love me and stuff? i miss that. can we go back to that?”  hinata complains, sounding dejected.

kageyama shuts his eyes, taking a deep breath to keep control of his emotions.  “do you want me to apologize for giving you attitude?”  he asks softly. 

hinata knits his brows together tightly.  “it doesn’t matter if  i want you to. an apology is worthless if it isn’t sincere.”hinata says. his eyelashes flutter as he meets kageyama’s gaze. kageyama wants to tell him he’s pretty. even when he’s mad.  “so i guess the real question is — do  _ you _ want to apologize?” 

kageyama nods. 

“use your words then, dork.”  hinata whispers against his lips.

“i’m sorry.”  kageyama says. it’s not enough. hinata is still looking at him with expectant eyes.  “i’m sorry for giving you attitude. that was uh, mean …  of me to do. ”

hinata sizes him up cautiously. then he nods. “i forgive you.”  he decides.  “now seal it with a kiss.”

kageyama humors him without protest, leaning forward and pecking hinata’s chapped lips. chapped, but still warm and perfect under his. “you know i love you even when i’m giving you …  a  _ stinky _ attitude, right?”

hinata chuckles,  “well, duh.”

“then why…”  kageyama trails off, looking at hinata curiously.  “why’d you get so upset?”

“because bakageyama,”  hinata says the nickname fondly — gently as how his hands feel when he grabs kageyama’s, bringing his knuckles to his lips and peppering them with kisses.  “we had a really nice day in our new apartment, don ’ t you think?”  he waits for kageyama to nod before he continues.  “if we‘re gonna spend everyday with each other, we need to practice doing things like apologizing and stuff. so we don‘t end up hating each other.”

“ i could never hate you.” kageyama objects quietly. 

hinata smiles tenderly. kisses his knuckles again.  “you know, you’re really sweet sometimes, tobio.” 

kageyama tries very hard not to blush and fails miserably.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hinata jerks off a bonsai plant in the next chapter


	2. hinata gets intimate with a bonsai plant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hinata makes one too many sexual jokes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> literally WHAT am i writing here.
> 
> i made kagehina so weird ????? goodbye this is a whole crackfic

the next morning, it takes them approximately half a decade to get out of the apartment. it's already nearing two in the afternoon by the time kageyama starts their car up. hinata's waiting outside the vehicle, complaining about all the heat, but ultimately deciding that the outside heat is more bearable than the heat that's been trapped inside the car for literal hours. 

kageyama thinks he’s exaggerating at first but soon comes to understand. the moment he sits down in the driver's seat, he can practically feel his leg hairs singe. this, combined with the burn of the stagnant air once his entire head is inside the car, makes him unprecedentedly dizzy. he switches the air conditioning on as soon as the engine starts, breathing heavily as it starts ventilating _hot_ air. he thinks this is exactly what hell feels like. 

he decides to join hinata outside while the car is cooling down. 

hinata, who smiles up at him and stands on his tiptoes and tries to steal kisses in the parking lot of their new apartment complex. 

kageyama keeps pushing his face away, chuckling lowly at the way hinata whines and begs for just one ' _smoocharoo_ ' as he puts it. 

(once again kageyama cannot believe this is the guy he fell for. the one he moved in with yesterday. the one he absolutely intends to spend the rest of his life with.)

when their car is finally at a reasonable, non-heat stroke inflicting temperature, they start their journey across the city to the furniture store. kageyama had done some _actual_ research last night on his phone after apologizing to hinata, while the man in question was purposely hogging his futon and looking over his shoulder because apparently kageyama was ‘leaving him out’ and that wasn’t allowed since they live together now. 

there are quite a few furniture stores in the city, but the couple had strategically picked the _third-highest_ rated one because the two higher class stores were, to put it simply, way too fucking expensive. so expensive kageyama almost popped a blood vessel while they were browsing the online catalog. hinata had to stroke his hair and then braid it just to calm him down and ease him out of the heated rant about how unfair society is. moments like that between them remind kageyama how grateful he is that he has hinata. he doesn't know how he got so lucky—meeting someone who actually understands him. kageyama is more of a realist, he is, but sometimes he truly thinks hinata was gifted to him by means of fate. 

and then there are also moments like right now, where they're stuck in traffic at two-thirty in the afternoon on a saturday. hinata has been blasting pop songs with sugary sweet melodies and pulsing bass lines for the better part of half an hour. and just as kageyama _truly_ feels like his brain is about to combust—hinata takes it up a notch. he plays emotions by mariah carey and sings along, complete with his own screams to battle her whistle tones. 

and he thinks _actually_ , hinata shouyou was handed over to him by the devil himself, though he imagines not even the devil could put up with this. 

hinata is intent on putting on a full performance, dancing in his seat, despite being restrained by his seatbelt. his voice rings through the car with a certain dissonance that might have been endearing if it weren’t for the fact that the earth was melting like a proverbial ice cream cone under the sun and irritating the ever loving shit out of him. 

every couple minutes, kageyama reaches over to the stereo and turns the volume knob all the way down, leaving hinata singing acapella for a couple of moments before he realizes what he's done. he reacts melodramatically every time it happens, like after the twelfth time he's still utterly appalled at this act of betrayal. 

(" _kageyamaaaa_ , that was the best part!" he whines for the millionth time. every part is the best part apparently.) 

when three o'clock rolls by and they're still in traffic, kageyama thinks he might literally be on the verge of a serious conniption. even hinata has burned out a little at this point, switching his playlist to one full of smooth jazz. and while it does little to alleviate the pricking in kageyama's brain, he does appreciate the sharp decline in noise level. 

"i can't believe we're still out here," hinata says, reclining in the passenger seat. "this shouldn't be allowed... i think the people holding the line up should be jailed." 

kageyama says nothing, focusing his tired eyes on the road ahead of him. or well, the license plate in front of him. he can’t see much of the actual road due to the number of vehicles crowding every inch of concrete. 

"how is traffic even real? like _helloooo_ , just drive!” hinata continues his spiel, angrily gesturing at the jumble of automobiles that surrounds them. it's properly suffocating. 

and kageyama can’t help himself. “maybe if you'd gotten up earlier, we wouldn't be in this predicament." 

he doesn’t look, but he can feel the incredulous look hinata throws at him. "you're blaming this on _me_?”

"not the traffic itself," kageyama grumbles. “i’m just saying we could've easily avoided this if your dumbass hadn’t gone and labeled every single one of your boxes wrong.”

(this morning had been stressful for kageyama. after hinata continually refused to get out of bed, he’d watched the idiot sort through every box—each one labeled wrong. boxes that said underwear actually had volleyballs in them. boxes that said volleyball gear had shirts. and so on. it was a miracle he hadn’t collapsed from the dangerous rise in his blood pressure.)

hinata deflates. “well, _sorry_. i wasn’t trying to be careless, i swear—i was just really excited to get my stuff into the mover’s van ‘cause i wanted to hurry up and live with you already.” he sniffs. kageyama instantly feels terrible, even though he knows he has a perfectly normal reason to be upset. but hinata is just so… _so,_ “didn’t mean to completely ruin your day with my incompetence." he adds, tone passive aggressive as ever.

kageyama frowns deeply. "i never said that you ruined my day. or that you’re incompetent.” 

“it was… _implied_.” 

“i’m sorry.”

“no, no—don’t apologize.”

“why not?”

“because i was at fault this time.”

“i know that, dumbass.” 

"then why the hell do you look like that?" 

"like _what_?" 

"like you're... constipated!” hinata blurts and kageyama’s first instinct is to reach over and grab his puny little head. "OW—kageyama _stop!!_ keep your eyes on the road!" 

it’s half past three when they finally find a spot in the parking lot of _momo’s furniture_. kageyama has barely put the car in park and hinata’s already tumbling out of the passenger seat, eager to stretch his legs out. 

kageyama rolls his eyes, but he’s following suit the moment he pulls the key out of the ignition. he peers at hinata on the other side of the vehicle. watches his face pinch as he stretches his arms over his head. kageyama smiles stupidly, unable to stay irritated at someone this fucking cute. 

“come on,” kageyama says, extending his hand. hinata stares at it in awe. the speed in which the instant regret smacks kageyama is truly extraordinary. “wh-what?” he stutters. knows the tips of his ears are turning red.

hinata’s bottom lip trembles. he’s touched. “tobio,” he cries, voice full of emotion. “you wanna hold hands…in public?” 

kageyama feels like a complete dunce right now, standing awkwardly with his hand out. hinata still isn’t holding it, just looking back and forth between kageyama’s face and his hand in disbelief. “hurry up and hold my motherfucking hand before i change my mind.” he says fiercely, though his head is down and painted red with embarrassment. 

hinata laughs loudly at that, but to kageyama’s relief, he entwines their fingers. he sidles up next to kageyama, smiling brightly at him. he looks… proud? 

“shut the fuck up.” kageyama says. 

hinata bites back a smile. “i didn’t say anything.” 

kageyama thinks he might pass out. “you’re probably… thinking stuff in your head.”

“wow, you’re _right_ ,” hinata says, pretending to be amazed. “that is what people do in their heads, huh? think _thoughts_.”

kageyama rips his hand away stiffly, marching towards the store like a man on a mission.

“oh, babe—i was only teasing!” hinata calls after him. 

——————————————————————————

the first stop, according to hinata’s list (kageyama doesn’t think this list is very compelling, but hinata seems really happy with it and goddamnit he’s weak for his boyfriend's toothy grins) is the plants. 

the _plants_.

they’re standing in a mass of green, both real and fake. it smells both dusty and earthy in this corner at the same time. hinata is feeling up a bonsai plant so hard it’s almost pornographic. kageyama doesn’t understand why the first place they need to be right at this very second, is the plant section, so he says as much. 

“because plants set the mood.” hinata answers him right away, still stroking the bonsai in a way that makes the mother passing by with her child gasp audibly and cover the toddler’s eyes. 

kageyama raises an eyebrow, “the mood.” he repeats. he’s lost. staring at the bonsai is not putting him in any sort of mood. he’s just kind of annoyed that it’s getting more action than him. “what mood is this?” 

hinata hums and draws back from the little tree, tapping his chin thoughtfully. kageyama holds back a yawn. after thoroughly pondering the broad range of moods plants can radiate, hinata sticks a finger in the air. his face brightens up like there’s a lightbulb over his head. “sultry.” hinata says before rubbing his hands together like a villain. or a fly.

kageyama finds hinata’s conclusion to be preposterous. 

“you’re telling me this bonsai is _sultry?_ ” kageyama glares at the bonsai. “this is a horny plant?” 

hinata nods. 

“this plant is turning you on?” 

“i strongly believe it has the potential to.” 

by now kageyama has fully realized hinata is doing a bit. right in the middle of the furniture store. because of course, he would. kageyama should tell him to stop acting ridiculous, they’ve got some serious shopping to do, but— _but_ —

kageyama pulls hinata in by his collar, staring hinata dead in the eyes. “you trying to fuck this plant or something?” 

hinata smirks, “what, you jealous?”

kageyama shakes his head, releasing hinata. “there’s no need. i could take this stupid tree in a fight.” he says, raising his fists against the helpless bonsai. 

hinata whistles lowly, “whoa, tobio. you are _ruthless_. he doesn’t even have arms. it ain’t a fair fight.” 

“yeah? maybe he should’ve considered that before he tried seducing my boyfriend.” 

hinata’s lips part, jaw going a little slack. “cut.” he says in his director's voice, kageyama almost pouts. he was kinda getting into it. “sorry. i know i killed the joke, but that was just - actually kind of _hot_.” 

“really?” 

“uh huh,” hinata shamelessly checks kageyama out, eyes raking up and down his body so obviously it pains him. then he leans in, lowering his voice. “would you actually say that? like in real life?”

kageyama squints. tries to put himself in a situation where someone that isn’t him is trying to charm their way into hinata’s pants. his hinata. he feels something sour in his gut at the thought. “i don’t think there’d be any dialogue,” he says honestly, “think i’d just throw a punch.”

hinata looks pleased. “you shouldn’t do that. even though i think it would be _very_ sexy of you to assert your dominance like that for me.” he says it like a dare—like maybe he wouldn’t mind seeing kageyama fight some sleaze in an alleyway to protect him.

when hinata starts wiggling his eyebrows, kageyama cuffs him, making him yelp. “stop being horny.” 

(two minutes later, hinata finds a cactus and holds it out to kageyama excitedly. “look! it’s you!” he chirps. kageyama kind of wants to kiss him… and maybe also punt him across an american football field.)

the next stop is the kitchen. kageyama is actually dreading this part, since he and hinata are so shit at cooking. they stand among the pots and pans, scowling at how many different ones there are. they’re both on the same page here. completely flummoxed by the abundance of kitchen materials and being less than knowledgable about the difference between them. 

hinata elbows him, “bro, which pots do we get?” 

kageyama just shrugs, “i dunno… maybe this one?” he points out a particularly large one. _it could probably fit an entire rotisserie chicken_ , kageyama reasons. he looks over at hinata for a second opinion. 

instead of giving his thoughts, he’s setting up behind the nonfunctional stove, grinning mischievously. “tobio!” he whisper shouts. “record me!”

“why.” kageyama says tiredly, but he’s already obliged his boyfriend’s request, pulling his phone out of his pocket and sliding to the camera. 

hinata’s eyes are practically sparkling under the lusterless lights. how he manages to look this golden in a place like this, in the midst of a display kitchen, is positively baffling. but also, not. because he’s hinata shouyou. if anyone could find a way to entertain himself with a wooden spoon and a soup pot, it would be him. 

“my cooking show is about to air.” hinata says jovially and his cheeks are tinged pink from excitement. kageyama wants to cry. this is really such a bother—but in his eyes, hinata is a cherub. he can do no wrong. he is sweeter than sugar. kageyama is weak for those honey amber eyes, that refract the lights just so (he thinks it kind of looks like there are stars in them).

he can’t help it—he humors him. “yeah? what’s it called?” he asks as he hits record. 

hinata grins. “ _shouyou’s recipes_.” he says, very avant-garde. he looks proud of himself. kageyama’s heart is clenching so tight he fears it might actually be a heart attack, brought on by the extra breadsticks last night. he doesn’t know which is worse. death by adorable idiot boyfriend or grease-soaked cheese bread. “is it on?” hinata whispers loudly. 

kageyama nods, giving him a thumbs up from behind the camera. 

hinata closes his eyes for a moment. and then another moment. kageyama waits patiently, lip caught in his teeth as he stares at hinata’s pixelated form through his phone. 

when his eyes open again, it’s as though he’s flipped a switch. he’s like a professional, poised and charismatic like this is a real television prime time show. kageyama is caught off guard a bit. he wonders if hinata would’ve gone into show business if he never fell into the abyss that is volleyball. 

“good evening ladies and gentlemen! welcome back to yet another one of shouyou’s scrumptious recipes. i’m sure you’re all excited to see what’s on today’s menu, _right?_ ” he leans forward, cupping his hand around his ear.

there’s a pause. kageyama realizes he is hinata’s audience. he clears his throat. “yes, shouyou senpai!” he puts on a high pitched timbre for the sake of the bit. 

hinata nods, satisfied with his audience's voice. he beams at the camera, smile effervescent. “today we’ll be making my mother’s _signature_ chicken noodle soup. it’s great for both those in sickness _and_ in good health. truly a classic.”

they continue like that for the better part of ten minutes, with hinata mixing invisible ingredients and kageyama, drowning in his affection, playing the part of the audience, interacting whenever hinata signals for him to. 

then they are very rudely interrupted by a stingy middle aged couple who mistake kageyama for hinata’s guardian and proceed to tell him that he can’t let his son play in the kitchen display. kageyama ends the recording there, glaring daggers at the couple as he grumbles that he’ll do whatever the _hell_ he wants before hinata intercepts the interaction with placating smiles and rushed apologies.

hinata loops their arms and drags kageyama over to the dressers. 

“your list is a little out of sorts.” kageyama comments as he runs his hands over the smooth mahogany surface of the armoire before him. “and by that, i mean it sucks.”

hinata makes a face at him. “and you swallow.”

kageyama blinks, “well, yeah. mama ain’t raise no bitch.”

“you’re supposed to get more flustered than that, bakageyama.” hinata complains, aimlessly turning the knob of a drawer until he accidentally unscrews it completely. he makes a tiny noise of panic as he catches it—staring at the loose knob in his hands in shock. 

kageyama rolls his eyes. “dumbass.” he snatches the knob from hinata and screws it back on himself. 

“someone’s good with their hands.” hinata says, laughing at his own innuendo. 

kageyama grins as creepily as he can, then rears his fist back menacingly, “wanna take them for a test run?” 

hinata responds by letting out an _eek_ and cowering behind a dresser that’s almost taller than him. kageyama drops his arms, chuckling wickedly at his boyfriend’s expense. “you’re scary!” hinata cries, tuft of orange peeking from behind the bureau. 

“you’re just a wuss.” 

at the insult, he jumps out, scowling. “you wanna fight?” 

kageyama shakes his head, “pick a dresser first.” 

hinata groans, “but they’re all so ugly!” 

“who the hell cares? it’s not supposed to be pretty. it’s supposed to hold your fucking clothes.”

“i’ll _die_ before i put my clothes in any of these godforsaken pieces of garbage.” 

kageyama sighs, exasperated. he grabs hinata by the arm (the little one shrieks in protest, drawing curious and annoyed eyes from other shoppers) and pulls him to their next stop—couches. 

hinata immediately flops onto a beige-colored one, wiggling his butt until he feels comfortable. then he pokes at the cushion, eyes narrowing with scrutiny. he starts bouncing in place and kageyama thinks he might be doing a bit again, but hinata’s face is deadly serious—pulled tight with concentration. 

kageyama looks down at him with a puzzled little frown. hinata continues whatever strange ritual he’s doing. “what…what are you doing?” he asks, voice laced with both irritation and genuine interest. 

hinata doesn’t answer. instead he brings his face to the armrest and sniffs it. kageyama stares at him in horror and cuffs him. “OUCH?” hinata looks up at him, bottom lip jutted out childishly. “what was that for?” he winces as he rubs the back of his head.

“you’re being weird,” kageyama states as his explanation. 

hinata’s face goes blank. “really. you let me jerk off a bonsai plant, but you draw the line at sniffing couches?” he questions dryly. 

kageyama makes a noncommittal noise, somewhere low in his throat. “you never answered my question.” 

hinata huffs loudly. motions for kageyama to sit next to him. when kageyama very obviously hesitates, he scoffs. “do you not _trust_ me?”

“shut up—of course, i trust you.” he says, then hurriedly takes a seat beside hinata. 

hinata’s side-eyeing him. “you’re weirder than me.” he murmurs. before kageyama can disprove that statement, hinata speaks again, “anyways, i was assessing the quality of this couch.” hinata explains, patting the cushion between them. 

“…assessing…”

hinata nods. “based on the color, bounciness, thickness, and squish quality…” he counts each category on his fingers. and suddenly kageyama is fixated on the lines of his hands—firm and sturdy and stronger than one would think, but kageyama knows. knows these hands and fingers like they are his own. “hello? are you even listening? christ.” hinata whines. 

“sorry. was looking at your hands. continue,” he grunts out, pulling the collar of his shirt over his nose in an attempt to conceal the color in his cheeks. 

hinata glances down at his palms. then back up at kageyama. he cocks an eyebrow—face morphing into some smug and _annoying_ expression. “no, no. i should apologize. for being such a _distraction_.” kageyama wants to beat hinata to a pulp. he also wants to have sex with him on this stupid beige couch. “ _ehhh_? what’s with that look? i can hear your dirty thoughts from here, you pervert.” 

kageyama grabs his face roughly. “shut. up.” hinata giggles, even with face all squished by kageyama’s death grip. “you look stupid.” he says before he lets go. 

hinata’s rubbing his jaw, but he still looks particularly arrogant, smirk intact. “i bet i would look even stupider face down into this couch.” he purrs—loud enough for just kageyama to hear. 

he swears almost goes into cardiac arrest. 

kageyama chokes on his own spit and erupts into an extremely violent coughing fit. hinata just laughs, loud and carefree, like what he said wasn’t that big of a deal at all. and maybe it isn’t. maybe kageyama just gets flustered too easily. hinata’s always been better at that. for someone who’s seen as this wholesome ray of sunshine by the rest of the world, he sure does have a dirty mouth when it comes to things like this. 

“so—“ kageyama coughs again, “the couches. let’s rank—rank the couches.” 

hinata grins at him. he looks downright evil. “of course.” kageyama releases a breath of pure relief as hinata actually complies, ranting about how the color of this couch is shitty and the squish quality is just as trash. “i give it a six. an above average couch, but nothing special.” 

“i don’t see the problem with it.” kageyama admits, kneading the cushion with his knuckles. it feels soft enough. 

“raise your standards.” hinata says pointedly.

kageyama snorts. “you’re too high maintenance.”

hinata shakes his head. “you just don’t understand. a couch with such a low rating will give you crazy back pains after a while.” 

“how do you know that?” kageyama asks dubiously.

“i know… _everything_.” hinata whispers dramatically.

“ _dumbass_.”

they migrate to a different couch. it’s a dark shade of maroon and much bigger than the last one. when kageyama sits down—he feels the difference. hinata is having a field day beside him, bouncing happily on the cushion like he’s an eight year old in a bouncy house. 

“this one—it’s perfect!” he exclaims. 

kageyama has to agree. “it’s really plush.” he observes, mimicking the way hinata bounces, minus the boundless enthusiasm. “should we get it?” he inquires, turning to his boyfriend, who is sinking between the cushions. he looks so content with it too—like if the couch swallowed him up, he wouldn’t mind at all. 

“absolutely,” hinata replies. “tobio, don’t get mad, but i think i’m in _love_.” he cries, stuffing his nose into the cushion eagerly. 

“please stop sniffing the couch.” kageyama pleads. “check the price tag.” he urges, seeing as it’s on hinata’s side. 

hinata is dazed and elated as he grabs at the laminated strip of paper. then, his eyes scan it—and all the color drains from his face. the smile fades to nothing. 

“um??” kageyama prods when hinata goes dead silent. 

hinata reluctantly reveals the number on the tag, turning it to kageyama.

he takes one look at the zeroes and his jaw goes slack. “what the _fuck_?” he rasps in disbelief. “i thought this place was in our budget?!” he hisses.

hinata nods solemnly. he looks devastated. “looks like we’re star-crossed lovers, couch-san.” he says sadly, fingers tracing pathetic hearts into the fabric. 

in the end, kageyama has to pry hinata from the overpriced couch. 

however, hinata’s broken heart quickly heals when he catches sight of the beds. he breaks free from kageyama’s hold and rolls onto the nearest one. “oh, this is nice.” he says, nodding approvingly, “i can definitely see us having raw, passionate sex on this one.” 

then kageyama attempts to strangle him.

hinata is insufferable the entire time they walk through the bed section. each bed prompts a very detailed monologue on which sex position would be best. he’s way too shameless and it has kageyama turning fifty shades of crimson. he is in hell. the traffic earlier was nothing compared to hinata’s filthy fucking mouth. 

“holy shit, this headboard is massive,” hinata is saying as they come to the last bed in the section (thank god). “tobio, do you think i’d look good handcuffed to it? answer quickly.” 

kageyama does not answer quickly. he does not answer at all. he tucks hinata under his arm like a beach chair and high tails it out of the bedroom portion of the store before he can perish from public humiliation. hinata laughs the entire time.

“why do you insist on embarrassing me?” kageyama mumbles as they walk through the store—now without any direction since hinata’s stupid list had ended right after the beds. “is this some kind of sadist kink you’ve yet to let me in on?” he whispers angrily. 

hinata is as blithe as ever, matching kageyama’s strides with a skip in his step. “i have no idea what you’re talking about, babe.” he says happily. 

“you want me dead. i’m convinced.” kageyama says moodily, blowing his bangs out of his face. 

“oh, don’t be like that, tobio. you know i just like to tease you.” hinata chuckles as he bumps their hands. kageyama looks over at him. he’s grinning from ear to ear, eyes soft. hinata’s hand bumps his again, but this time, kageyama grabs his wrist, holding it place before swiftly entwining their fingers. 

kageyama casts his eyes to the floor, “it’s not fair…” he grouses. “you know i can’t—i can’t say stuff like that back.”

hinata hums in agreement. “that’s why it’s fun, though.” hinata swings his hip playfully into kageyama’s, disrupting their pace. kageyama scowls, but there’s no malice behind it. “i like seeing you all cute and flustered. is that a crime?”

“i wish it was.” 

hinata cries out, clutching his chest like he’s been shot. “ _damn_ , that’s cold… we just moved in together and you already want me in a jail cell.” 

“it’s what you deserve.” kageyama huffs, earning a pout from his boyfriend. 

“i thought you _loved_ me.” hinata moves closer, pressing their sides together as they walk and nudging kageyama’s shoulder with his cheek. 

“i do. i love you a lot.” kageyama says abashedly under his breath. hinata beams at him so dazzlingly bright he wants to shove his face away. 

“i love you _more_.” hinata says, challenging. 

kageyama stops walking. he wasn’t aware that this was a competition, but now that he is, he has to win. “dumbass. i obviously love you more.”

“source?” 

“my … heart? what the hell.” 

“that’s valid.” hinata says, “but my heart loves you even more.”

“no it doesn’t.” kageyama grunts.

“it does—and i’ll prove it.” hinata says gleefully. 

“i’d like to see you try.” kageyama scoffs. he’s not worried. he knows for sure he loves hinata more. 

that is until hinata blurts, “i’d give up volleyball for you.”

kageyama widen to the size of cereal bowls. his mouth opens and closes—then opens again. and hinata is just staring up at him, completely unfazed. undeterred. like he meant every word. kageyama takes a breath. “i would _never_ let you do that.” kageyama splutters, disbelieving. 

hinata smiles, “even if i really wanted to?”

kageyama shakes his head firmly. “that’s the thing, though—you’d never _want_ to do that. quitting volleyball would be like… death. a death before your actual death—and that one would be so much more painful.”

hinata is silent for a moment, looking him over with gentle surprise. “ _bro_.” he breathes out. “that was deep.” he’s staring up at him with wonder swirling in those deep amber eyes. 

kageyama feels shy all of a sudden. “…shut up.” 

they’re looking through the full living room sets, bickering lightheartedly about the paintings on the drywalls when a speaker crackles above them. 

“ _attention shoppers—momo’s furniture will be closing in half an hour._ ”

kageyama exchanges a look of horror with his boyfriend, both of them thinking the same thing: _we didn’t get to buy anything_.

they trudge back into the parking lot empty-handed and a little discouraged. this was their first attempt at adulting together and they failed quite epically. hinata is slouched against him dejectedly. 

“we didn’t even get the bonsai.” he laments. “i really liked the bonsai, tobio.” 

“we’ll get it next time,” he promises, pressing a kiss to hinata’s temple. he’s a bit worried though. what if the next time they repeat the same conundrum and end up leaving with nothing yet again? 

hinata seems to be thinking the same thing. sheepishly, he says, “maybe we should ask suga and daichi to come with us next time.” 

and as embarrassed as it makes kageyama feel, he agrees. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> karasuno family and company next chapter yassssss


End file.
